The more you engage with a person, the stronger a professional relationship—and personal friendship—you can build. Just because there’s no seltzer dispenser to gossip around, no cafeteria to gather in, or no office to go to, doesn’t mean you can’t make friends with your colleagues. There are lots of things you can do to get to know them whether they’re a county, a country, or an ocean away. On a scheduled in-person day, make a plan with your new office friend to check out a new French fry shop in your area, or a brunch place down the block.
Every boss will like that research finding—and here’s another one. A Gallup study found that remote employees with work friendships were more fulfilled, more loyal, and less likely to seek work elsewhere. Early on, I spent one Friday night walking around a local, vaguely hipster flea market with a friend from work, her mother, aunt and cousin. And when another co-worker made me a list of the best coffee shops, restaurants and cafes around, I visited them. Every year, about 11.2 percent of Americans move, according to the US Census Bureau. Each of us will probably move about 11 times in our lives.
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But what I’m hearing you say is, in a world where we once had predictability, there’s now just uncertainty, and uncertainty creates stress. Some CEOs have said this explicitly — that they feel that if young people at the company want a future and want to rise in the ranks, that they have to develop in-person relationships with people. Banking CEOs have been really firm about this, as have partners in some law firms.
If someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time. Be observant of people and notice how they treat others because that’s likely how they’ll treat you. Here are some unexpected ways to make friends in a new city. Marisa Franco, Ph.D., was previously a professor at Georgia State University, where she became an academic expert on friendship. She currently works as a policy fellow at Millenium Challenge Corporation.
Schedule Conversations with Co-workers
Partaking in community events is another surefire way to make friends in a new city. Stay up to date on all the happenings in your area through social media, flyers, or the good ol’ local newspaper. Community https://remotemode.net/ events happen more often than you think, and they’re a really good time. Participating in local movie and TV screenings, block parties, or trivia nights are all great ways to meet new people.
Try to step away from small talk and have deeper conversations; a little bit of vulnerability goes a long way to create a solid friendship foundation. Now that you’re an expert friend-maker, and you’ve warmed up to the people you talk to on a frequent basis, you’re ready to spread your wings and fly to your extended network. Microsoft’s 2020 Work Trend Index showed that as the pandemic progressed, people discarded their broader networks and relied more how to make friends when you work from home on the people in their immediate social circles. To branch back out and meet some friendly faces, you can easily venture outside the office using the office friends you’ve already made. If you do find one or two people who seem more authentic than others, don’t hesitate to reach out (in an appropriately contemporary way, of course). But just signing up for a class or course or club isn’t always the most intuitive endeavor, especially when you’re new.